Week 1: DONE!

Well it's been my first week on Tina Reale's Best Body Bootcamp and it turned out as good as I hoped so far.  I was really worried at first because I didn't think I was going to be that sore after the circuit and that it would work my legs more then I wanted but I was wrong! My arms are killing me (in a good way) and I'm definitely being challenged in new ways, and learning new workout moves. I've always done better with someone else guiding my workouts so this is perfect for me, since she makes me do my weights, and in a way that I enjoy more. She did make me cut back on my cardio, but I'm working on being alright with that, I knew she probably would so it's just an accepting thing at this point.

Plus she gives us goals, and I've decided since she's giving me the physical activity goals, my doctor is kinda giving me food guidelines, I'm going to kinda do maybe one goal that is more physical/mental health, and one that's spiritual. In the grand scheme of things, spiritual health is very important I feel, and something I want to integrate fully in my workouts! 

I've not done the best these weeks with food. I've accidentally ate my allergies which put me in crazy pain, and then snacked way more then I should have (and probably ate more sugar then they'd like) but Monday is a new day!

Something God has really brought to my attention recently is choosing to be happy. Choosing joy. it's something Joyce Myers and others have discussed, but I guess He really made it real to me. I've asked for the joy of the Lord many times, and I think He helped me realize and accept that the only person holding me back from that is myself.  He can give me all He can but I have to accept it and act on it out of faith.  I have to choose to be happy, to have joy no matter the circumstances, knowing and trusting that it will all be alright. That He holds my future in His almighty hands and will not let them fall...or let me fall for that matter.

I guess I know what one of my goals for next week might be now:

Say one thing I'm thankful for, I like about myself, and/or that makes me happy! 

After this week I think I may narrow it down to one of these three and maybe 3 for each, but small steps!

Be Your Own Kind Of Beautiful, His Kind Of Beautiful

 

Psalm 139

King James Version (KJV)

Psalm 139

 ¹O lord, thou hast searched me, and known me.
 ²Thou knowest my downsitting and mine uprising, thou understandest my thought afar off.
 ³Thou compassest my path and my lying down, and art acquainted with all my ways.
 ⁴For there is not a word in my tongue, but, lo, O LORD, thou knowest it altogether.

 ⁵Thou hast beset me behind and before, and laid thine hand upon me.
 ⁶Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high, I cannot attain unto it.
 ⁷Whither shall I go from thy spirit? or whither shall I flee from thy presence?
 ⁸If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there.
 ⁹If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea;
 ¹⁰Even there shall thy hand lead me, and thy right hand shall hold me.
 ¹¹If I say, Surely the darkness shall cover me; even the night shall be light about me.
 ¹²Yea, the darkness hideth not from thee; but the night shineth as the day: the darkness and the light are both alike to thee.
 ¹³For thou hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me in my mother's womb.
 ¹⁴I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.
 ¹⁵My substance was not hid from thee, when I was made in secret, and curiously wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.
 ¹⁶Thine eyes did see my substance, yet being unperfect; and in thy book all my members were written, which in continuance were fashioned, when as yet there was none of them.
 ¹⁷How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! how great is the sum of them!
 ¹⁸If I should count them, they are more in number than the sand: when I awake, I am still with thee.
 ¹⁹Surely thou wilt slay the wicked, O God: depart from me therefore, ye bloody men.
 ²⁰For they speak against thee wickedly, and thine enemies take thy name in vain.
 ²¹Do not I hate them, O LORD, that hate thee? and am not I grieved with those that rise up against thee?
 ²²I hate them with perfect hatred: I count them mine enemies.
 ²³Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts:
 ²⁴And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

Something quick that's been on my mind...I've been thinking about and talking with  my mother about the beauty of nature & she made a comment about if the world so beautiful  now just imagine what it will be like in heaven.   I realized how  unique & beautiful we are....if nature is that amazing, and when we see angels we think how beautiful they are & yet we were made in the image of God!  How awesome is that!  

Right now, after the holidays & the weight-gain associated with it, all the junk I've ate and how much I feel icky, ugly, fat, & gross. No matter how many people have told me they think I'm beautiful, or look a lot better it's just hard to see it myself.  So when this came to mind, I'd like to think that it was my heavenly Father reminding me.

Joyce's Confident Women Devotional I started this year talked about a verse in this Psalm (my favorite Psalm by-the-way) & how we are unique; that no talent we have increases our value or a talent we don't have decreases it.  With my battle at finding my self-worth & not giving in to my feelings at the start of this year, this was a nice reminder.

 

I'm about to start a fast on sweets &  portion sizes & I think my focus may be to begin my 'things I'm thankful for journal' this time with at least one thing I'm thankful for each night.  Also I'm sure that when I start eating healthy again it will help me feel better about myself because honestly when you take care of yourself & eat healthy, you feel better & more confident. You should love God enough to take care of the hand-crafted, personal, & unique image of Himself He gave you & ONLY you.

Wildflower, by Elena Wrevhn

*Originally written on December 29th, 2010*

my sister wrote this poem for me and it has meant so much to me that I wanted to re-post it on this blog...I'm starting an art project my psychologist suggested, to make a joy collage.  The first two things that came to mind was this poem and GIR.  I don't think I could ever find words to express how much this poem has meant to me, that she, anybody really but especially my sister, would think of me that way, would be inspired to write something like this to me.  I think it was her first poem about someone-to someone.

Wildflower
By Elena Wright Wrevhn
She is no rose,
With vicious thorns,
Nor common daisy,
Far to quaint,
They call her wildflower,
They call her beauty,
They call her heaven-sent,
I call her angel,
She is a lady,
With silken petals,
Her blossom dreams,
In every color,
They call her wildflower,
They call her beauty,
They call her heaven-sent,
I call her friend,
She is so sweet,
With whispering perfume,
That forever kisses,
Your fondest memory,
They call her wildflower,
They call her beauty,
They call her heaven-sent,
I call her sister,
She is of strength,
With soil so pure,
And roots so deep,
She cannot be moved,
They call her wildflower,
They call her beauty,
They call her heaven-sent,
I call her Rebecca

This fits with what Joyce Myers just preached on this morning, identity theft.  She preached on Ephesians Chapter 1

Redemption in Christ

  
³ Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, ⁴ just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, ⁵ having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will, ⁶ to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He made us accepted in the Beloved.
⁷ In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of His grace ⁸ which He made to abound toward us in all wisdom and prudence, ⁹ having made known to us the mystery of His will, according to His good pleasure which He purposed in Himself, ¹⁰ that in the dispensation of the fullness of the times He might gather together in one all things in Christ, both^[a] which are in heaven and which are on earth—in Him. ¹¹ In Him also we have obtained an inheritance, being predestined according to the purpose of Him who works all things according to the counsel of His will, ¹² that we who first trusted in Christ should be to the praise of His glory.
¹³ In Him you also trusted, after you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation; in whom also, having believed, you were sealed with the Holy Spirit of promise, ¹⁴ who^[b] is the guarantee of our inheritance until the redemption of the purchased possession, to the praise of His glory.

This also goes along with the book I've started by Joseph Prince, Unmerited Favor. The first chapter he mentions Joseph and how:

"God's definition of success is contrary to the world's definition...From Genesis 39:2, it is clear that success is not what you have, but rather who you have! Joseph literally had nothing materially, but at the same time, he had everything because the Lord was with him...We need to learn to stop pursuing things and start pursuing Him. God sees your relationship with Him as the only thing that you need for every success in your life."

Genesis 39:1-2

^"1Now Joseph had been taken down to Egypt. And Potiphar, an officer of Pharaoh, captain of the guard, an Egyptian, bought him from the Ishmaelites who had taken him down there. ² The LORD was with Joseph, and he was a successful man; and he was in the house of his master the Egyptian."

Every morning and as I've ran on the trail recently with the Lord, He has brought to mind how everything about me, everything about life, within life, everything that has breath speaks of Him and His majesty and grace and redemption.  All that I do, all that I am becomes and shows more and more of Him rather than me as I grow closer to him. Every powered stride I take on my runs, every mile I manage to go with Him, by Him, through Him, every quilt I make, every loop I crochet, every stroke I paint, every tree and piece of nature, and every piece of me that finds joy within nature. He lives within my heart and His cleansing blood is constantly washing over me.  His light shines from me, His joy radiates out of me.  All that I am, truly am, is really Him.  That is what makes me and all that I am so amazing, is its not me!  Its what gives me a true confidence.  The love that Christ has for me is truly amazing and I cannot wait to learn more and gain a deeper true understanding of His amazing grace that saved a retch like me!