Friday, August 2, 2013

Little things, little thoughts

It is amazing how some of the simplest things can help you're self esteem and make you feel beautiful.

I recently went to Panama City with a friend for a christian teaching seminar (to keep her company) for the A Beka Program. The seminar itself was in Pensacola Florida but we decided to stop in Panama for the weekend before and after to hit the beach. So fun! Anyhoo the seminar was quite amazing, we attended the 1st grade classes since that's what she will be teaching in a few weeks and I'm so excited for her. You could really feel the love of the Lord there.

That's me and my bestie Chelsi!

Before we arrived, back in Panama I decided to pick up some quality face wash, extra make up, a couple of dresses, and some new blouses to maybe try wearing when I got back to work. It's amazing how just taking the time to take care of my skin and put on some nice makeup really helps you love yourself more. It's such a small thing but I've felt a great deal better about myself the first 3 days so rock on, the last few have been a little tougher.

We are worth it!

I'm also trying to get into eating right and better workout habits, not end up munching, skipping the gym so much, or only doing cardio. I'm only doing a little weights each time, but it's something! Once I get into healthier habits and better shape I think the joy will return.
I know this is a step that will help me get there again.

While I'm slowly working on these I've got to learn to hold my head up high and love myself regardless,which is the hardest step of all and one I've never truly passed I don't think. It's hard to really grasp with such an ambiguous nature, how does one really make a concrete attainable goal out of this?   If you've followed my blog any you've read all the different attempts I've used so far...

Lastly I'm currently working on growing spiritually. I want my relationship with the Lord to grow, to have a stronger foundation, stronger relationship, more wisdom, and more faith.  To really understand what He meant by loving the LORD with all your heart, mind, soul, and strength. With passion and actions, God will attend to my cry.

I wish I could say I'm still as happy and joyous currently as I was with the simple makeup earlier this week but I'm not, I feel like I've let myself down, failed, but realization of failure is just my turning point.  I shouldn't let my weight and physical appearance affect my mood so much, but I am a work in progress, and honestly healthy living is part of who I am, so by not taking care of myself the way I should, I'm hurting myself in ways others might not understand.

Things I need to remember mentally & work on while reaching these goals:
  • Not feeling like a failure every skip day
  • Not comparing ANYTHING of mine to ANYONE ELSE, I am unique
  •  It isn't about weight, body fat, isn't about numbers, its about healthy living and taking care of myself
  • Pay more attention to caloric quality and not just quantity.
  • Smiling regardless of how I feel.

Things I need to remember nutritionally speaking:
  • Don't eat so much dairy! As little as possible without obsessing
  • Remember protein after workouts
  • Talk to an RD student intern and get guidance 
  • Cut back/out grains, as little as possible
  • Eat as clean and natural as possible
  • no munching
  • smaller portions, no seconds!

Things I need to remember workout-wise
  • always remember to push myself
  • stick to an hour 6 days/week
  •  remember weights!
  • stretch after working out a little
  • stretch routine at least on off day
  • Fit in chiropractic back wellness routine sometime during the day.
The need is here, the desire is here, so just do it!