Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Don't Judge Me

Female I'm not a psycho chick, or being stalked by one, these are just a few of the traits people can judge me by. Along with age, physical stature, religious views, sexual preferences, clothing style, hair & eye color, etc.,

I know throughout history race has caused much pain to others not like themselves. People sharing my shade of melanin have especially so maybe this is payback, but for the first time I can remember I was judged my my skin color and gender (with a small portion of my age and physical appearance probably on the side).

I went to workout with a black ex-trainer friend at a his gym, LA Fitness, for a quick workout after work. I've worked out with him and his other buddy (also black) once before no problem.

We first met at work and upon finding out we not only share the same initials, but also last name and church,  instantaneously we became friends. That afternoon right when we were getting started some guy who worked there stopped him to talk

and they talked

I didn't want to start without him since we usually circuit machines together so after a while I went to see what he was doing, I figured he just got involved in a conversation since he is a very charismatic person...but nope.  The gentlemen talking with him looked at me funny as I approached then glancing back at him I didn't see what was going on really.

Well the guy walked away and we were going to get started but I could tell my friend was really upset. I went on to workout as he waited for what seemed like an eternity and  after talking with two different people discovered what the problem really was...

"you were working out with your buddy and that's cool but now you're working out with these white chicks" (plural entitling my sister who had just bought a membership (and closed it just as fast).

Apparently it was alright for him to workout with a black gentlemen just fine, but if it is a female and she is Caucasian that is a no-no.  He said honestly even if I was a black chick they would probably not have an issue with it since I'd either be his sister, cousin, or 'the girl on the side' but since I'm white, I cannot possibly be a workout buddy.

Needless to say I will not be joining LA Fitness anytime soon, not that all of them are that way but I'd rather not after all this.

Why is it people seem to have such a problem accepting what is different then them?  We all are entitled to have our own opinion and feelings, and I'm not saying to disregard that, but that doesn't give anyone the right to hate what isn't them. Respect the other person's right for the same.

Enjoy our differences, I remember a DC Talk song "Colored People" that keeps playing in the back of my mind...

Pardon me, your epidermis is showing, mister
I couldn't help but note your shade of melanin
I tip my hat to the colorful arrangement
Cause I see the beauty in the tones of our skin

We've gotta come together
And thank the Maker of us all

We're colored people, and we live in a tainted place
We're colored people, and they call us the human race
We've got a history so full of mistakes
And we are colored people who depend on a Holy Grace

[1, 1, 1, 1... 2, 2, 2, 2... 3, 3, 3, 3... 4, 4, 4, 4]

A piece of canvas is only the beginning for
It takes on character with every loving stroke
This thing of beauty is the passion of an Artist's heart
By God's design, we are a skin kaleidoscope

We've gotta come together,
Aren't we all human after all?

(repeat chorus)

Ignorance has wronged some races
And vengeance is the Lord's
If we aspire to share this space
Repentance is the cure

[1, 1, 1, 1... 2, 2, 2, 2... 3, 3, 3, 3... 4, 4, 4, 4]

Well, just a day in the shoes of a color blind man
Should make it easy for you to see
That these diverse tones do more than cover our bones
As a part of our anatomy

(repeat chorus)

We're colored people, and they call us the human race
[Oh, colored people]
We're colored people, and we all gotta share this space
[Yeah we've got to come together somehow]
We're colored people, and we live in a tainted world
[Red and yellow, black and white]
We're colored people, every man, woman, boy, and girl
[Colored people, colored people, colored people, colored people, yeah]


  1. Oh my gosh!! That is HORRIBLE!! Seriously...Who CARES if you're white? It shouldn't matter if you're glittery rainbow colored, black, red, purple, whatever... That just angers me. Which LA Fitness was this? I'm so sorry this happened. It isn't right at all.

    1. Thanks, it was the East-West location. Not the best of their gyms anyhoo from what I hear, but it was close to my house.

  2. It doesn't surprise me about the judgement people have on each other especially when it comes to color, but it get's pretty old. That kind of judge does nothing for the love and joy individuals can provide to each other if they consider that aspect. I've experienced it too many times and it still perplexes me why does color have to be a factor. I'm gonna share this and then I'm gonna get off my soap box. I remember growing up with my best friend who is white and we were had so much fun as kids. I stayed with them and went to their church, and mine of course, but I remember one time we were all over another church members home and I was attracted to once particular girl in our group. I made a reference how pretty she was to my friend and how I wanted to date her, well, he told me that wasn't a good idea! I asked why and he said i should stick with dating black girls and she should date white guys only. I asked what's the difference, we're all Christian and we have the same faith so I don't see the problem. He told me he just see it being wrong and if I do date her we can't be friends. Needless to say it did something to me but mostly it hurt my heart because if came from my best friend. Well I didn't ask her out but he and I are still best friends and I love him and his family. I never told him how I felt about that statement and he probably won't remember but for the person to experience such judgement they never forget. Judgement based on color is selfish and closed minded and at some point it has to take a back seat and shut up! Like Paige I'm sorry you experienced such judgement.

    1. Thanks, we changed to American Bodyworks and although the owner is at least part black and his workout partner is a young white female, my workout partner was still asked after I had to leave if he was training I guess judgement is everywhere. I will at least say we were never approached at Gold's gym West Cobb or at Life University's gym so there are a FEW places that aren't' so judgmental, but since AB is cheaper I'll keep my Gold's froze until I can convince my workout buddy to join and my brother-in-law to let them (who I also workout with) join there under me lol. We will workout together anyways whether at Life or American Bodyworks, but it's just annoying to know that I'll be watched while we are.

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