Little things, little thoughts

It is amazing how some of the simplest things can help you're self esteem and make you feel beautiful.

I recently went to Panama City with a friend for a christian teaching seminar (to keep her company) for the A Beka Program. The seminar itself was in Pensacola Florida but we decided to stop in Panama for the weekend before and after to hit the beach. So fun! Anyhoo the seminar was quite amazing, we attended the 1st grade classes since that's what she will be teaching in a few weeks and I'm so excited for her. You could really feel the love of the Lord there.

That's me and my bestie Chelsi!

Before we arrived, back in Panama I decided to pick up some quality face wash, extra make up, a couple of dresses, and some new blouses to maybe try wearing when I got back to work. It's amazing how just taking the time to take care of my skin and put on some nice makeup really helps you love yourself more. It's such a small thing but I've felt a great deal better about myself the first 3 days so rock on, the last few have been a little tougher.

We are worth it!

I'm also trying to get into eating right and better workout habits, not end up munching, skipping the gym so much, or only doing cardio. I'm only doing a little weights each time, but it's something! Once I get into healthier habits and better shape I think the joy will return.
I know this is a step that will help me get there again.

While I'm slowly working on these I've got to learn to hold my head up high and love myself regardless,which is the hardest step of all and one I've never truly passed I don't think. It's hard to really grasp with such an ambiguous nature, how does one really make a concrete attainable goal out of this?   If you've followed my blog any you've read all the different attempts I've used so far...

Lastly I'm currently working on growing spiritually. I want my relationship with the Lord to grow, to have a stronger foundation, stronger relationship, more wisdom, and more faith.  To really understand what He meant by loving the LORD with all your heart, mind, soul, and strength. With passion and actions, God will attend to my cry.

I wish I could say I'm still as happy and joyous currently as I was with the simple makeup earlier this week but I'm not, I feel like I've let myself down, failed, but realization of failure is just my turning point.  I shouldn't let my weight and physical appearance affect my mood so much, but I am a work in progress, and honestly healthy living is part of who I am, so by not taking care of myself the way I should, I'm hurting myself in ways others might not understand.

Things I need to remember mentally & work on while reaching these goals:

• Not feeling like a failure every skip day
• Not comparing ANYTHING of mine to ANYONE ELSE, I am unique
•  It isn't about weight, body fat, BMI...it isn't about numbers, its about healthy living and taking care of myself
• Pay more attention to caloric quality and not just quantity.
• Smiling regardless of how I feel.

Things I need to remember nutritionally speaking:

• Don't eat so much dairy! As little as possible without obsessing
• Remember protein after workouts
• Talk to an RD student intern and get guidance 
• Cut back/out grains, as little as possible
• Eat as clean and natural as possible
• no munching
• smaller portions, no seconds!

Things I need to remember workout-wise

• always remember to push myself
• stick to an hour 6 days/week
•  remember weights!
• stretch after working out a little
• stretch routine at least on off day
• Fit in chiropractic back wellness routine sometime during the day.

The need is here, the desire is here, so just do it!

It's In The Little Things

It's funny how the little things you do everyday mindlessly, the things you don't think twice upon, can affect others.

This morning a friend of mine, Chelsi, posted about how just an unconscious smile blessed someone that day.  Something she not only didn't think about, but is self-conscious about also!  I remember working at QuikTrip and, while in the middle of a fight on the checkstand, I did my fake happy girly voice and smiled, with the usual greeting to the lady who came in and walked up to my register. As we finished the transaction she thanked me, and was so appreciative to see someone who actually was happy and loved their job, how rare that was.  It made me feel a tink bad honestly for faking it but it also actually changed my mood too!  Not only did the Lord use me to brighten up her day but He innocently used her to change my attitude and cheer me up!

Today at lunch, after eating I did my usual walking around the library reading, and passed a student who told me I inspired him to try walking while he read and now he loved it!  I can't recall how long I've walked around that library reading various books over the past 3 years, but to think that something so simple, God can use to reach others, amazes me.

But then He does it for me everyday...in the little things He blesses me with.  A beautiful painted sky every morning or the glowing of the moon and stars at night, uniquely crafted each time.  A bird bathing in a puddle, a lighting bug's cute little butt all lit up, honey bees, flowers, the sound of rain drops and the flash of a lightening, or even just the secondhand unprovoked compliment from my mother.

^"For you see your calling, brethren, that not many wise according to the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble, are called. But God has chosen the foolish things of the world to put to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to put to shame the things which are mighty; and the base things of the world and the things which are despised God has chosen, and the things which are not, to bring to nothing the things that are, that no flesh should glory in His presence. But of Him you are in Christ Jesus, who became for us wisdom from God—and righteousness and sanctification and redemption— that, as it is written, “He who glories, let him glory in the LORD.”"

1 Corinthians 1:26-31 NKJV

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^"Howbeit for this cause I obtained mercy, that in me first Jesus Christ might shew forth all longsuffering, for a pattern to them which should hereafter believe on him to life everlasting.

 Now unto the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only wise God, be honour and glory for ever and ever. Amen." 

1 Timothy 1:16-17 KJV