Be Joyous

So my best friend Chelsi started this 100 things that bring her joy-picture list thing, & my sister Elena started one also.  Seeing both of theirs I wondered what I would put on my own.  So here part of it is!


1. God the Father


2. Jesus Christ my Savior

3. Holy Spirit who guides me


4. God's Word, the Holy Bible


5. Psalm 139


6. running in nature with God


7. Childhood forever friends-Marie Jernigan


8. hanging out with best friends, people who accept you for who you are


 9. Hikes or Nature walks (esp with my Chelsibabe)


10. Being with my sisters

11. accidentally falling asleep on the couch with my mom


12. veggies/ fresh produce

13. Salads














13. Salads



14. growing things


15. going to the theater/orchestra


16. musieums, especially art


17. Ballets


18. the night sky/star-gazing


19. Sunrises & Sunsets, whether outside running or in my car.


20. Cat head rubs

You are my Joy

There is something about the moon that people find inspiring. We sing about it, poets speak romantic words regarding it, it's been painted, photographed, drawn, and gazed at.  Stars accent its beauty and whisper sparkling sweet nothings as the waters act as its perfect dance partner.

I started a joy collage a while ago, collecting photos online I wanted to print of things that brought me joy...when my mother's computer got hacked into and now they are hidden in a mass of files we saved before reformatting it.  Thinking about it a few days ago and wanting to finish it, I noticed my friend updated her blog with her joy list also, and this began me pondering again on what brings me true joy as I walked outside with the morning sun's rays hitting my shoulders and face.

As things begin hitting my mind...how the sun was hitting me warming me, the sound of rain and how it falls on window panes and drips off my nose, a gentle breeze and the warm smell of honeysuckle, the moon and stars, nature, trail running, hikes, John Denver songs, dancing alone like an idiot in a shirt and undies, painting, piano, symphonies, theater, museums, lace, my hands hugging a hot cup of tea where the warmth flows through and the steam squeezes out the tiny hole upon my face, cooking and creating a new healthy dish, gardening, growing and eating vegetables, a really good hug, the idea of my fingers entangled with my love, gazing in a porch swing, quilts, cuddling, making my mom's coffee in the morning, the release of myself of feelings and emotions as pain hits my fingers holding a pen upon finishing a letter...

What exactly was it that attracted me to these things, what attributes? And as I continued to walk in the morning sun it hit me, quite literally, it was Him that attracted me to all of it.

Whenever you are generally discussing art with someone, many times you will ask what is their favorite artist, what style or technique do they enjoy the most.  This is because art, especially painting, is such an emotional thing. You cannot create art without leaving a piece of yourself behind, lost within the birth of the new creation. Its the you-ness that makes art so unique.  There has been and never will be an artist like Picasso or Van Gogh or yourself.  This is also like when you have a child, there is a piece of yourself and your partner that forever goes into that child. And there will never be another child with the same characteristics.  This is what each of us are, this is what the world is, for God.

The moon in and of itself is quite cold and ugly, a gray dusty rock that spins and revolves around this world, and yet without the light from the sun reflecting upon it, we would have no idea it was there for the most part.  This is a perfect example of us!  We are each a moon, an ugly, cold, rock, that spends its time revolving around this world.  Christ is the Sun, and it is His holy light that when we reflect brings about the true beauty created within each of ourselves that the world could never reveal. 

This concept is also how I've began to look at all the creations, all of my favorite things.  As I sat outside swinging on our porch eating my raw snack veggies I realized that it was the characteristics of God and His art.  The qualities I enjoy of nature shine of Him and His love. The pieces of Himself He put in each of them.  The joy I feel as I was swinging outside gazing at our Japanese Maple, are both aspects and characteristics of Him, each one unique to the individual enjoying them. 

God used immense emotion when He created the world, when He created us.  Christ used immense emotion when He came down in the form of a man to save us all, so He could gaze upon His own artwork, His own moon, and find joy.

Proverbs Lady

*Originally written on January 7th, 2011*

A friend recently posted her goals for the new year on her blog, and while I have some, I never thought about typing them out anywhere, but since I have some free time at work I decided why the heck not.  Writing (or typing currently) is supposed to help anyhoo.

• Work on being a 'Proverbs Woman' and all that it entitles. Study this chapter more intensely and let the Lord guide me.
• Take my workout routine and make it livable, I want to live for the Lord and take care of myself for Him, not before Him.  Keep my life centered around Him, His love and plans for me...to live and have my being centered around 'being about HIS business' and I think that health and fitness are a huge component of that, and He wouldn't have given me such a passion for it if it wasn't. We are His temple, His dwelling place-we shine His light & bear His image!  He hand crafted each and every one of us and how we take care of His temple, how we show it respect (or a lack there of) shows our love and respect toward Him and His gift and sacrifice.  He has become the primary reason for and a major component of my workout routine, and I want to keep that up also, I always feel such an amazing bond with Him during my workout times, it's a time I use to reflect upon Him and absorb as much of  Him in as possible! I don't want ANYTHING to hinder that, I don't want ANYTHING before Him so I want to just recheck myself this year and make sure everything remains in the proper order!
• Also, I want to help my Mother get back into fitness. We eat crazy healthy enough, but after some injuries she's had a hard time getting back into the routine, so I am giving myself a goal to help!  She's done and does so much for me it's the least I can do! I love her so much and want her to be around a long time! She already wants to herself so I just want to help!
• I've recently gotten into sewing and I would like to continue to grow my skills at it, I hope God continues to provide people to make quilts for so my talent can blossom!  I have gotten bitten by the quilt-giving bug lol, its all my Mom's fault, thank you so much Mom!
• Start a granny square afghan, complete my 'joy' collage, & would like to get back into drawing & painting (including pottery)...and maybe if I'm lucky, scrapbook sometime this year :p
• Make a mosaic & a batik, learn to knit.
• Continue with my goal to get out of debt and complete it within the 3 years I originally planned!
• Increase my distance run by 2 miles. A friend has bugged me about not making any major fitness goals so besides the one previously mentioned...this will be it.
• Work on my handwriting, I love writing letters, but I feel for the poor soul that is reading them!  My handwriting gets pretty bad at the end, especially when I am writing about some strange thought or idea the Lord gave me, or a bible verse He showed Me I excitedly wanted to share, and my thoughts are going faster than I can comprehend, and that's way faster than I can write!  While they've never said anything, I still would like to have a handwriting that wasn't described as what a serial killers would look like.
• Don't take life too seriously, or myself!  Work on keeping joy of the Lord in every and all situations, keeping an optimistic attitude always, continuously loving and laughing, and learning to continue to see myself though His eyes!

God has really been dealing with me regarding the 'law' I set for myself and my perfectionism...how I need to let go and let God.  Embrace His sacrifice and unmerited favor, His amazing grace that saved a retch like me. Joseph Prince, in his book Unmerited Favor, has been discussing Christ's success, and that even before the 10 commandments were created, Joseph obeyed them (think on the Potiphar's wife situation).  He had the guidance, grace, and righteousness of Christ, before Moses ever created the law, Before Christ came upon the earth.  This confuses me a bit and is something I want to think on and study more intensively so I find it ironic that without trying I managed to create 10 goals...this speaks of something but what I'm not sure lol.



According to Christian Resources Today

Ten : 10 - Biblical Meaning of Number: deals with completeness that happens in a divine order or completed during a course of time. There's nothing that is left wanting within the complete cycle the number "ten" has just completed.
(In today's society this number is looked at mostly when referring to some kind of ranking or describing something that's close to perfection)

Wildflower, by Elena Wrevhn

*Originally written on December 29th, 2010*

my sister wrote this poem for me and it has meant so much to me that I wanted to re-post it on this blog...I'm starting an art project my psychologist suggested, to make a joy collage.  The first two things that came to mind was this poem and GIR.  I don't think I could ever find words to express how much this poem has meant to me, that she, anybody really but especially my sister, would think of me that way, would be inspired to write something like this to me.  I think it was her first poem about someone-to someone.

Wildflower
By Elena Wright Wrevhn
She is no rose,
With vicious thorns,
Nor common daisy,
Far to quaint,
They call her wildflower,
They call her beauty,
They call her heaven-sent,
I call her angel,
She is a lady,
With silken petals,
Her blossom dreams,
In every color,
They call her wildflower,
They call her beauty,
They call her heaven-sent,
I call her friend,
She is so sweet,
With whispering perfume,
That forever kisses,
Your fondest memory,
They call her wildflower,
They call her beauty,
They call her heaven-sent,
I call her sister,
She is of strength,
With soil so pure,
And roots so deep,
She cannot be moved,
They call her wildflower,
They call her beauty,
They call her heaven-sent,
I call her Rebecca

This fits with what Joyce Myers just preached on this morning, identity theft.  She preached on Ephesians Chapter 1

Redemption in Christ

  
³ Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, ⁴ just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, ⁵ having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will, ⁶ to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He made us accepted in the Beloved.
⁷ In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of His grace ⁸ which He made to abound toward us in all wisdom and prudence, ⁹ having made known to us the mystery of His will, according to His good pleasure which He purposed in Himself, ¹⁰ that in the dispensation of the fullness of the times He might gather together in one all things in Christ, both^[a] which are in heaven and which are on earth—in Him. ¹¹ In Him also we have obtained an inheritance, being predestined according to the purpose of Him who works all things according to the counsel of His will, ¹² that we who first trusted in Christ should be to the praise of His glory.
¹³ In Him you also trusted, after you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation; in whom also, having believed, you were sealed with the Holy Spirit of promise, ¹⁴ who^[b] is the guarantee of our inheritance until the redemption of the purchased possession, to the praise of His glory.

This also goes along with the book I've started by Joseph Prince, Unmerited Favor. The first chapter he mentions Joseph and how:

"God's definition of success is contrary to the world's definition...From Genesis 39:2, it is clear that success is not what you have, but rather who you have! Joseph literally had nothing materially, but at the same time, he had everything because the Lord was with him...We need to learn to stop pursuing things and start pursuing Him. God sees your relationship with Him as the only thing that you need for every success in your life."

Genesis 39:1-2

^"1Now Joseph had been taken down to Egypt. And Potiphar, an officer of Pharaoh, captain of the guard, an Egyptian, bought him from the Ishmaelites who had taken him down there. ² The LORD was with Joseph, and he was a successful man; and he was in the house of his master the Egyptian."

Every morning and as I've ran on the trail recently with the Lord, He has brought to mind how everything about me, everything about life, within life, everything that has breath speaks of Him and His majesty and grace and redemption.  All that I do, all that I am becomes and shows more and more of Him rather than me as I grow closer to him. Every powered stride I take on my runs, every mile I manage to go with Him, by Him, through Him, every quilt I make, every loop I crochet, every stroke I paint, every tree and piece of nature, and every piece of me that finds joy within nature. He lives within my heart and His cleansing blood is constantly washing over me.  His light shines from me, His joy radiates out of me.  All that I am, truly am, is really Him.  That is what makes me and all that I am so amazing, is its not me!  Its what gives me a true confidence.  The love that Christ has for me is truly amazing and I cannot wait to learn more and gain a deeper true understanding of His amazing grace that saved a retch like me!

To understand thyself...

*Originally wrote on May 15th, 2010*

You would think being a 24 [soon-to-be quarter of a century old person hot diggity dogness] I would understand my workings more.  I honestly question what I really do know, truely know about me...I used to know what I did NOT like to eat, but found out as I got older that I pretty much like everything, and I absolutely love all the things I hate...veggies and right now onions and mushrooms (yummness).  So if this is just with food how sad that I don't honestly know much on myself.  I don't know what my subconscious really is thinking, pondering upon.  I seem to recently be having a weight issue, although mine is considered a blessing to some, if it is its the worst kind.  I can't seem to keep my weight up, and I am getting to the point where I wonder what its really going on in my head, what do I really feel like that must be holding me back from getting back to my healthy weight?  I've handed the whole thing over to God...at least I speak that everyday but I must be keeping some part or I would be past this...its made me question everything I do think I know about anything really.  I mean, is there anything that I am certain I know about myself?
My faith!  I KNOW I'm a child of the most high God, I KNOW Jesus Christ died for me, is in my heart, and I KNOW AND LOVE our relationship and all the little ways he speaks to me...the way he reveals himself and his immense love for me, a love that sadly would be the aspect I don't understand really. Why I'll never know, but I don't have to I guess, I'm having a hard enough time figuring myself out much less somebody that states that "my thoughts are above your thoughts, and my ways above your ways, for as the heavens are higher than the earth so are my thoughts than your thoughts, and my ways, your ways" Isiah 55:8-9 (all from memory so I may be off a tink)
I know I love nature, I love plants and fresh air, I care about the environment, hugging trees, and am the kind of person that gets excited about watching things grow!  I never feel as connected to the Lord as I do outside, its like his art gallery, each tree has its own character and is unique touch it adds to everything around it...each leaf, every flower and flower petal, body of water and the whole world that opens up I won't even start on.  I feel at peace outside, connected to him. I love to run, especially outside, around nature!  There is just something about running along with trees, grass, and the warmth of life all around.  How somebody couldn't feel close to Christ I'll never understand.
I love art, painting with my friend is my latest thing, but I've always enjoyed art,  museums, theatre, music, dance, and everything else included.  I've drawn mostly myself, although I also enjoy sowing quits, crocheting, cooking (which I consider an art), scrapbooking, and I'm up for trying just about anything artsyish!  Seeing people through art, seeing their souls in small pieces, its one of the beautiful things in this world.
I love my family. I feel so blessed that God gave me the family I have, even with all their quirks and problems.  Amongst my parents fights, my father's brain tumor &  temper, the over-emotionalness of pretty much everyone, and all the other things my family is so totally awesome.  My father made sure we loved each other, regardless if we wanted to and I'm so thankful.  My sisters love me so much, and while we fight and they annoy the heck out of me sometimes, they truely care and I adore being with them always.  I love my mother, the walking definition of mother. She bakes, cooks, cleans, gardens, paints, sows, quilts, croches...the women grows her own yeast to make her own homemade bread for goodness sake.  But mostly she loves the Lord with all her heart, mind, soul, & strength and although she's not perfect by any means, I look up dearly to her.   My father was almost the same, aside from the temper & tumor he was still an awesome dad.  He had a wondeful sense of humor, could grow anything, fix most anything, and honestly knew most everything, but mostly he was a family man. He was good with computers, medical stuff, math, english, history, and was the best at being a dad.  This took me a while to realize, but he tried with all his being to be the perfect father and have the family he never got to have, and thanks to him he are the close family we are.  I will never trade the time I got to take care of him near the end of the life...never in a million lifetimes. I am also thankful for non-blood family, my best friend I would never trade, and she is probably the only non related person who has never stopped believing or loving me...her parents took the role as my parents also (my second set lol) and her family became my family also. We can read each other and I feel that we really are related, although not according to legal standards.
All this doesn't help that I still am no closer to discovering my inner mental issues I have, but what did I really expect just typing on a blog would really reveal?  That I like to ramble a bit too much?  I have discovered at least a few things I am certain of, my 'firm foundation' that we all need. ..As long as I keep handing it over to the Lord, I know he'll get me though this, and I'll discover new things about myself along the way!
If you survived my first blog EVER...congrats!  Be kind in judgments is all I ask...